Choosing Your Reality
Hello there. I'm Jason tantra. And today I want to talk to you about the idea of being able to choose your reality.
And what do I mean by reality? Well, I want to talk about how you see the world and knowing that you have a choice about how you want to see the world and how tantra can give you a different pair of glasses to give you a different perspective, a different idea on how you see the world.
You see many people think that the way that their life is, is the way that it is. And actually a lot of the way that people without thinking about it, experience life is actually based upon what we call conditioning, how it was with the family, how it is with the job, how it is with the people that you live within society, how it is that you live in the street that you do in the apartment that you do in the house that you do.
And a lot of these things are given to us and we pick up that that's the way that life is, and that's the way that life should be.
And for most people, they never really question the idea of what's being presented. They just accept life as it is, as it's turning up for them and feel like a powerlessness or not even know that they had any power in terms of how you can choose that. And one of the things we call in tantra, when we say talk about your freedom, your freedom is the ability to know that you can choose how you perceive and how you interact in the world around you.
Tantra will definitely show you new ways of you experiencing yourself. For example, say you were coming to a weekend. People talk about feeling an extreme intimacy, feeling, an extreme love, feeling, a liberation, a freedom, getting clearer on where they're stuck on certain issues, stuck on certain things.
Things like pointing to some of the things to look at people talk about having profound out of body, out of world, universal intergalactic experiences of orgasm.
And they, it isn't that anything's doing it to them. It's that I, as a tantra teacher, um, talking to people and facilitating people through experiences, there's also something like unconscious and the unconscious collective of the container say of a, in that, for me as a tantra teacher, as somebody that's been on a spiritual journey, I kind of know these places.
And so I'm able to vibrate at those frequencies vibrate at those possibilities. And one of the things I do know, and this is one of my trade secrets is are here, invite some of my students to come and help me with the weekend.
Um, but what they're actually doing is helping keep the vibration of the room, keeping the possibility for the profound to happen for the miracles to happen for the out of the normal stuff to happen. And the reason why tantra weekends or residentials events are good is because they give you a unique pair of glasses or a unique insight for you to see a different possibility to know that there is a different way of being in your day-to-day world.
I sometimes talk about those as peak experiences. So Ingo, my beautiful husband and I, we offer diploma in tantra weeks, which are personal journeys in tantra. And actually after a week with us in some residential retreat, you come away from that and you can't, but help, no, you might try to ignore it, but you can't, but help know that there is an absolutely other possibility for you to experience this thing called life.
You see, most people are attracted to tantra because they have a dissatisfaction in their life, or they're curious and think, Oh my God, there must be more to this experience. It's of life, our, TantraLove festival that we do in Glastonbury with 130 men, we create this magical Wonderland.
I tell you what I don't see such love anywhere else. In other places between complete strangers, there's a vibration, there's, a collective intent to want to step out of the normal and step into love. Step into connection, step into sensuality, step into sex, step into all that stuff that makes us feel full, abundant, juicy, gorgeous human beings.
And we could be under the illusion that it was the other things that happened that enabled us to do this. And I have to tell you this isn't true. Those things are giving you the idea, giving you the vibration, making the invitation, but it's you, that chooses how you want to let yourself surrender into the miracles into the experience of that event.
Now I remember literally this week, okay. Taking, unfortunately, the things I talked to you about I have to actually do in my day-to-day life.
So, there's a situation in my life where there's two people that, um, on one hand I don't like, okay, just don't like them. Don't like how they are one of them, very sneaky and manipulative. Um, and I just don't like, and I could just sit with that.
Like if I look at the relationship of how my mother deals with people, she doesn't like she gets angry and ferments about them for months, you know, and just holds that anger holds that, like sick feeling, that uncomfortable feeling in her body.
And there's a lot of suffering that goes on in that it takes a lot of suffering to be with the dislike, the judgments and criticisms of others. And it's not a nice place to be. I remember this week, I had a meeting with these two people that shall remain nameless.
Um, just in case you're wondering it, aren't you okay. But, I woke up one morning at five o'clock in the morning and I could just feel all this energy going through my body, all this energy going through around the situation.
And it appeared to me like a storm, like, as storms come in, you know, if you're listening to this in the USA or the UK in winter months, we're used to storms coming in, and they wreak havoc and then they blow away. And the way that I was experiencing this was that I felt like it was a storm going through my body.
At this time I'm with you, I'm doing a daily meditation practice that is enabling me to sit still because normally if there's a storm coming in, if there's a situation coming in, I very easily get activated.
I very easily get caught up in there and get in the emotions, and I've suddenly lost myself into the emotions that this storm, this situation was kind of wanting to pull me into. And most people just get caught up in those situations and think that's life. But I want to offer you the possibility, as I said, that you can choose your reality and that you have the ultimate power, the ultimate choice.
So I did an experiment with myself. Okay. So going back to these two people, and I was like chewing over, because I had a meeting with them. I was at home and I was like this, as I said, woke up in the morning, this storm going through me and whilst this was happening, I was still sat on my centre.
And it was like, rather than being the storm, I was seeing the storm. I was observing the storm and I didn't need to get involved with all of the feelings and the emotions and the bitterness and the anger that were coming up.
Now, I'm not saying for a second to ignore anything that you're feeling. I think part of this journey of consciousness and awareness is about being aware of everything that's going on, being totally conscious, where it comes from, what it's about, what's going on really conscious, but actually not needing to get involved, not needing to sacrifice yourself on the journey of being really upset, actually that you could observe what was going on without needing to surrender yourself into it. And the other thing that I want to talk about here is where we can get attached, to feeling the uncomfortable judgemental, angry incessant feelings.
We, for me, I like the way I feed it. It's like an Eagle with a Clore on some prey that you can't let it go. There's the, it says Disney song, I think is let it go. Let it go. That was my mantra for 24 hours. And I really had to work on myself to undo my claws that were in this situation. It was causing me so much suffering. And I was like, surely you're in denial of yourself. You're in denial of the situation in denial of these people.
You need to defend yourself. You need to justify yourself. You need to say why you're doing those things. And I think that was like one mode that I was operating writing in. But I think I figured that I had another choice of letting it go, letting go of my anger towards the other people letting go of the need to be right, letting go of the need to make them know that they need to be right.
And really just letting go. And I let some behaviours go through that. Normally I would challenge. I was like, okay, we're going to do this as an experiment. I'm going to test not challenging people on those behaviours. And I'm just going to let them be how they are.
They weren't being abusive or root well, a bit rude. Um, difficult. Yeah. Manipulative. Yes. But, um, and okay. I could challenge and confront, but all that was doing in this situation was creating more and more conflict.
I'm not responsible for how these people act. I'm not responsible for what's motivating them to behave so way. What I absolutely have is my own freedom and choice to choose how I want to be in this situation.
I could walk away very much to do that. I could confront all this new option that I'm playing with is how could I be in that situation?. Still be true to myself, still be authentic, but not to get triggered or activated by other people's behaviours or the way that they are. And the trick is for me is to let go of what you need from them. Really let it go. As I'm recording this to you, we're in the middle of a pandemic. I don't know about you. I've been tested on that. I've had to let so much go let everything go.
Just let go of so much that I'm in a place now where I'm able to look at this situation and choose, make a choice that I want to let it go. And there are other choices that you can make. There are choices you can make about letting go of feeling guilty of things there are choices you can make about letting go of shame, feeling shameful about being a sexual, being about having desires.
There's also things that you can welcome in that you want more of, for me, I've done a couple of things that I've made happen because, um, again, um, at this age of recording, you own 48, okay?. And I've been thinking about my years of the age of 50 to 60 and that I don't want them just to happen by mistake.
I don't want to get to 60 and not have had some consciousness and some awareness around what is it I want to actively manifest as Jason, as a human being over the next decades. And I've made some very big, um, projects or, um, interests or invitations so that I can steer the ship in the way that I'm able to choose.
I want to experience more love in my life. I want to experience more touch. I want more sensuality and sexuality in a way that they're weaving together.I want to be able to have really deep, profound tantric experiences. And in my life, I want to let go of the things that hold me back.
That caused me suffering. And I want these things, not from a place of wanting of desire, but, but what's calling me what my soul, what my being, what my human being self wants to manifest. And for me, the crown, the sovereignty in this is being able to know that you can choose how to manifest that you can't always control what's going on around you.
You can't control other people. You can't control, um, situations that are happening in the world. But what you can do is you can choose your relationship with those. You can choose how you are with people. You don't like. You can choose how you are with people that you love.
Are you experiencing with them all the love that you want to experience? Are you able to make a choice about how you interact with people?
Okay, I'm not going to get angry with that person. I'm going to choose not to. And I'm going to sit with myself and see if there's a different possibility.
You see this information that I'm bringing you here in this video. If you knew the amount of freedom that you have to choose your heart's desire, that's the slogan of tantra for gay men, the slogan of our app, that you can choose your heart's desire and align yourself to that.
It can't help show up. It can't help manifest itself. It can't, but help be created. And then, yeah, the only thing that you need to recalibrate change, learn, discover evolve is you.
That's all you can do. And all that's needed for you to bring to you and the world that feels more loving to you. More truthful, more satisfying, more joy, more abundance. It's all in you in how you navigate that. And for me, it's two ways.
One is navigating of doing more of the things that you like. And the other one is how you process and work through the stuff that gets in the way and how you learn and how you make changes step by step. And for me, how tantra plays a part in this is it takes you out of your day-to-day and it literally tele ports. Tele ports you to portals, to experiences, to ecstasy and bliss in ways that blow your mind. They blow the mind.
That's good because that experience is beyond the ego. It's blown the mind, the mind can't even comprehend. It doesn't even try, let go of that. Let your mind be blown and let you be. You see your being and your ability to experience is broader than what the mind can compute.
Let me just repeat that. Cause that's important. Your ability to experience bless experience ecstasy experience, the profound truth is far greater than what your mind is able to compute. And the way to do that is through expanding your conscious, being aware, aware of yourself, aware of what's going on.
This is all lining up to a spiritual journey. And the part that I'm bringing you today it’s the knowing that you can change your reality. You can change what you receive as true. You can change everything in so many combinations that serves your higher truth that serves your joy, that that serves you.
Okay. I hope that's helpful. I've enjoyed sharing that with you today. Um, and if you've got any questions and want to talk about any of that, then, um, I'm available to you. Take care. Thank you for listening. Bye bye.